


paper cranes

by YAMAGUWUCHI



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Anxiety, Established Relationship, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Lowercase, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mild Smut, Multi, OCD, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Sleepy Cuddles, jisung has ocd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:26:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24739978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YAMAGUWUCHI/pseuds/YAMAGUWUCHI
Summary: in which delicately folded paper eases jisung’s worry filled mind.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin, Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Hwang Hyunjin/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Comments: 5
Kudos: 184
Collections: obsessions and compulsions





	paper cranes

**Author's Note:**

> okay i promise this is better than the summary ... anyways i hope you enjoy, also feel free to let me know of any possible mistakes :D

it was far too late for any of the members to be awake with the knowledge of a long day ahead, but jisung was sat on the couch, busying himself. 

the coffee table was pulled to his knees, and maybe it'd be more effective if he sat on the floor, but he had no motivation to move now. 

he had scissors to his right and a stack of printer paper to his left, excess scraps of it tossed haphazardly around. he was folding the paper almost rushed, hands cramping from how much he'd done it. 

minho watched him from the hallway, wondering when it'd be a good time to interrupt. though, jisung never quit moving. after one crane was finished, he moved onto the next piece of paper. the stack of cranes was growing steadily. 

but with a glance at the clock, minho decided that jisung needed atleast an hour of sleep. 

"sungie," he stepped forward and whispered, jisung just about having a heart attack at hearing him. "what're you up to?" 

jisung quickly got over his scare, turning back to the paper and folding slower this time, "making paper cranes." 

minho hummed and sat next to him, but not touching, "when did you learn how to do that?" 

"i watched a youtube video," jisung answered, also in a hushed tone. 

with his short replies, minho could tell something was up. 

"how bad is it?" he asked, worry evident in his question. 

they had a scale system to determine how bad jisung was feeling. he could handle contact if it was under five, anything above that the members knew to worry. 

jisung thought for a second, "maybe four? it was about a seven but i got distracted," he looked to the pile of paper cranes. 

"maybe four or definitely four?" minho had to be sure, because he would hate for jisung to feel any worse. 

"definitely," he said and leant into the elder's side, minho generously providing fingers to run through his hair. 

"jinnie was worried and told me to check on you," minho mumbled into jisung's hair, "how about we clean up here and get back to him, hm?" 

"okay, hyung," the younger muttered, unenthusiastically getting up and clearing off the paper and scissors. 

"where are you gonna put the cranes?" minho wondered as jisung put the other items in a drawer. 

"seungmin-ah can decide that when he wakes up," jisung shrugged and pulled minho up, leading them to where hyunjin was sleeping. 

minho chuckled, "so evil." 

their beds were way too small to hold three people, but they didn't mind half of their bodies being crushed by the other two. 

"baby," hyunjin almost whined when jisung curled up against his chest, "i was worried." 

"i'm fine, jinnie," jisung reassured, closing his eyes as minho settled against his back. 

an hour of sleep was better than none. 

\- 

jisung was surprised to feel perfectly content when he was woken up. minho was softly rubbing his arm, and hyunjin was kissing his neck. 

"it's too early for that, jinnie," jisung huffed but made no moves to push him away. 

hyunjin laughed quietly, "you'll wake up to that, but not your twenty alarms?" 

"why would i wake up to an alarm, when i can have you kissing me?" jisung smiled, as did hyunjin, and minho laughed breathily behind him. 

but hyunjin's mouth twitched, "are you okay, now?" 

jisung's grin never faltered, "never better. promise." 

\- 

schedules went well, everyone easily adopting jisung's bubbly mood. when he was happy, they were too. 

jisung always struggled at schedules, trying to get away from his mind when he should be focusing on something else. he was often found distracted, and no fans or media article could ever figure out the cause. 

though today, every time he flexed his hands, the cramps in them seemed to bring him back into the moment. 

\- 

the start of their american leg of touring began the next day. they were to fly to california and have a day of rest before beginning interviews the following day. 

their morning seemed slow paced. everyone mostly packed during the week and was just waiting to be picked up to go to the airport. 

jisung was having a good day, he determined after getting ready and packing the last few of his toiletries, though he knew it'd only get worse later on. 

he couldn't help but smile every time he found a paper crane hidden between books, on the edge of a dresser, precisely placed by seungmin sometime during the previous day. no one questioned the appearance of them, giving jisung the impression that minho told everybody where they came from without his knowledge, but that was okay. 

if he ignored that fact, it was like some sort of mystery that the other members were secretly trying to figure out. 

"you done?" hyunjin came into jisung's room, where the younger was zipping up his suitcase. 

jisung hummed a yes, leaving his bag laying on the floor and falling into the elder's arms. 

"what's wrong, love?" hyunjin's voice was quiet, whispered words for only them to hear. 

jisung whined lightly, arms tightening around hyunjin's waist, "don't wanna go to airport." 

hyunjin couldn't help but sigh, because jisung always got overwhelmed in crowded spaces, and he hated seeing him like that, "it'll be okay, yeah? me and minho-hyung will keep you between us." 

jisung nodded his head against his chest, "okay, thank you." 

hyunjin rubbed his back before pulling away, locking eyes with the younger. they were slightly watering, as if he was on the verge of crying. 

"let's go find min," hyunjin grabbed jisung's hand, his bag from the floor with the other, and lead them to the living room. all of their bags were pushed against the wall near the door, and hyunjin left jisung's there too. 

"hi, baby," minho smiled when jisung curled against him on the couch, hyunjin sitting on the floor in front of them. the other seats were taken. 

jisung didn't reply, only leaned in furthur to minho's side. one leg was hanging off of the couch, hyunjin gently rubbing over the fabric of his pants. 

\- 

when they were finally given the call to leave their apartment, a car waiting downstairs, jisung was hesitant to leave the elders soft touches. minho was running fingers through his hair, and hyunjin was playing with jisung's hands. 

jisung always got quiet and more touchy when they'd have to go to crowded areas, especially the airport where hundreds of fans would wait for them and try and invade their personal space. 

minho walked around their apartment with jisung, hand in hand, to double check every potential hazard was effectively turned off. if he didn't look, jisung knew it would bother him all throughout america. 

the other members knew how jisung felt, so they didn't bother fighting when the three boyfriends pushed past them to be able to sit together. 

they managed to get a car big enough to fit all of them, a seperate vehicle carrying their suitcases. 

"everyone have their passports?" chan asked when they all got in. there was rummaging in bags and shouted yeses, which gave the okay to leave. 

their manager sitting in the front gave them the same speech he always did; no stopping for pictures, don't wander off without a security guard, all things they've heard before. 

jisung wasn't listening. he had no plans of stopping at all, no plans of wandering away where he would be more exposed to everyone else. he'd stay right in between his hyungs, right where he belonged. 

it was crazy how yesterday he was in the brightest mood, one of his best days in weeks. then with the knowledge of being followed by an unfamiliar crowd suppressed all of those happy emotions. 

the car seemed to drive much too quickly. everyone else filed out first, security already waiting for them that came in another car. 

jisung, minho, and hyunjin were the last to get out, the youngest taking a deep breath before doing so. 

as promised, the elders stayed right next to him. they weren't as touchy, very aware of the phones recording their every move, but the occasional brush of skin helped to get rid of his shallow breathing. 

they checked in, went through security, finally boarded the plane after waiting in a secluded seating area for their flight to be called. 

they didn't get expensive seats, but their whole crew almost took up a whole cabin, so they knew they wouldn't be too bothered, if at all, by potential prying eyes. 

but now, it wasn't just about jisung's comfort anymore. minho, who was deathly afraid of heights, but always had to travel by plane, was trying to hide his anxiety. 

it was always difficult to get him to calm down, so worked up that words wouldn't reach his ears. but with him now sat between the two younger, and with gentle touches and whispered phrases, he managed to get through take off. he settled down as the plane grew steady, gliding calmly through the air. 

\- 

hyunjin ran his hands down jisung's sides, reaching under his shirt and gently rubbing his skin. minho spread jisung's legs, laying between them and putting his lips wherever he could reach. 

there were barely visible scars on secluded parts of his skin, left there from when he was young and couldn't find support. 

they were unmentioned now, just given light kisses on top of them. 

he talked about them before, briefly and quickly, because now they were a reminder of a struggle that he overcame after finding ones who listened. 

hyunjin and minho hadn't asked about them, knew to give jisung time to bring it up. they knew what they were, but it was obvious he hadn't resorted to it in a long time. they weren't worried, because they trusted jisung to come to them if he was feeling worse than his usual bad days. 

they were gentle with him that night. they weren't always, but they knew what jisung needed more than himself. he may have felt good yesterday and that morning, but the airport and plane had drained him. the elders knew he wouldn't be able to take being rough, that he might even get sick from the harshness they could give. 

they didn't have sex, just sucking each other off until they each were left in a daze, sweat clinging to their skin, breath heavy, tongues bitter with cum. 

minho wiped them down, throwing the washcloth in the bathtub, before crawling in behind jisung. 

jisung was once again in between the elders. sometimes he would fight about it, complaining that minho and hyunjin needed to be coddled at times, too. they would just fight back, forcing jisung down onto the bed while he writhed and giggled, eventually giving up. 

then sometimes minho and hyunjin would indulge jisung, crawling between the other two and accepting arms around himself, kisses placed on the back of his neck, a smiling jisung who finally got his way. 

that night, though, he didn't complain. he accepted their touches gratefully, and he was able to fall asleep within minutes. 

\- 

jisung was completely different on stage. it was what made everyone else think that he was happy all the time, that he never struggled with something besides a bit of anxiety. it was the furthest thing from the truth, but he couldn't help but become someone else on stage. 

he would feel nervous right before going on, but after seeing a filled stadium just to see them, to hear their music and see their dances, it warmed his heart and made him forget everything else. 

that concert was the same feeling. the previous night, filled with so much anxiety about the next day, the possibility of messing up, ruining the night for everyone, swam around in his head. 

the trio had fallen asleep early after a day of interviews, so when jisung woke up at an odd hour to use the bathroom, all of his worries crashed on him. 

he didn't even realize when he'd moved to the desk pushed into the corner of the room, sitting down and folding the pieces of notebook paper that was there to leave feedback about the service of the hotel. 

he was too busy trying to regulate his breath, along with straining his eyes to see in the dim room, the open curtains filtering in the barely lit up city. 

after all of the sheets were gone, jisung had nearly cried because the overwhelming feelings had not dissipated. he grabbed the cranes in handfuls, crushing them and throwing them in the trashcan next to the desk, all while teary eyed. 

hyunjin had soothed him that night, quiet sobs and labored breathing having woken him up. he saw jisung's outline, hunched in the chair, back straightening every time he'd manage to breathe in deeply. 

"sungie," he whispered and left the bed to slowly walk towards him. 

"i can't-" jisung tried to explain, tried to organize his thoughts into comprehensible sentences, but his mind was swarming. thoughts overlapped, some seeming to scream loudly over the others. 

"it's going to be perfect," hyunjin had began, kneeling next to the chair. he already knew the root of jisung's worry, having gone through this same scene many times before. "hm? isn't it always? nothing can mess you up tomorrow, not even minho-hyung's constant whining." 

jisung managed to giggle, but soon had to catch his breath. even though it was such a short and simple statement given from hyunjin, jisung's lungs felt clearer. 

now, standing on stage, his hand gripped the microphone, muscles tinging slightly with pain. it wasn't unpleasant, and it reminded him that even though he'd ruined ever pretty crane he made in an anxiety ridden haze, hyunjin had soothed him. he was reminded that he'd always have people supporting him, whether it be the shouting crowd in front of him, or the seven guys standing around him. 

\- 

"here," minho sheepishly said that night after the concert, legs sore and begging for sleep. 

jisung delicately took the paper, a roughly folded crane held between gentle fingers. minho must have ripped a blank page from chan's notebook, given the familiar lines adorning it. 

it wasn't folded perfectly, but minho's unmentioned reasoning behind it filled jisung's heart until it was ready to burst. 

he smiled, kissed minho appreciatively, and then hyunjin when he had come into the room holding his own for jisung. 

the cranes were tucked into his lyric book, marking the pages of songs he was working on, the wings laying flat. 

and every time he'd open it and see them, his hands seemed to twinge at the distant feeling, and he always felt an unmeasurable amount better than he had previously.

**Author's Note:**

> please leave kudos and comments ! they're what keep me motivated :) i hope you enjoyed:D


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